You deserve a round of applause. (Yes, you, Dear Reader!). Making the decision to purchase a sex machine is something very worth celebrating. After all, investing in a sex machine is also investing in your own pleasure! However, once you decide to buy a sex machine you next need to figure out what sex machine. Arguably, The Cowgirl and The Sybian are the two most popular options. But which, between the two, is best? Read on for a side-by-side comparison of the two most popular sex machines in the world, in 5 different categories. 

As you toss your 2021 paper calendar into the trash (good riddance! sayonara! adios!) amongst the condom wrappers, champagne foil, and tinsel, you’re probably thinking about what kind of energy you want to bring into 2022. This is the time of year when most people sit down and hammer out some New Year’s Resolutions, after all. (Though, let the record show a good reflect-and-resolve can be valuable any time of year). 

Santa was fuming. Twas the night before Christmas, but all through his house… creatures were doing more than just stirring. Vixen had a habit of running off to have too much fun right before work. But this time, she took Santa’s red-nosed power-lead, Rudolph, with her. He knew he shouldn’t have unlocked Rudy’s chastity cage, but he had a big job to do and Santa was worried the constriction might keep Rudolph from flying his best. But Rudy always had a horny problem, and it had nothing to do with his antlers. Santa needed a solution… and quick if he was to spread holiday joy in time for Christmas!